i like left 4 dead 2 way more than i expected. i still want to say, for the record, it's the same fucking game. it's a patch.

i like borderlands.

the other day i noticed i hadn't changed the little text banner that displays over my phone's hilarious background image since we moved to oregon. before, it said "ford the river" because we were rocking the oregon trail.

now it's been over a year and that message made no sense at all anymore, so i changed it.

now it says "it's just the phone" to apply to current situational humor.

just because you're paranoid, that don't mean nothing. it don't mean shit. you're just paranoid. no one is after anything, because they don't even care that much.

actually, it's probably more of that crisis confidence soup splattering itself all over your brainspace. ignore it, relax, get comfortable, and continue like it's as nice as it seems. four hours of mandatory overtime a week is a plus after a year of unemployment.

they gave me an ipod shuffle today. soon i might have insurance.

lost 400 gigs of music. nasty click.

the plan is to get it all back as my head demands it. will it take another five years, or more?

everything about the wedding was as close to perfect as i've ever seen. i'm glad everyone pulled off such a winning event, and i'm glad we were here for it and that i had the opportunity to help a little.

i think joose might be the worst commercially produced drink i've ever had (outside of the coca-cola museum). it was additional exponential layers of failure that led me to getting the jungle flavor, whatever the hell that means. it was a dare.

so, about halfway through the can (on day 2), i figured it would be easier to put the damn drink in a cup of ice and maybe the ice would neutralize some of the effects of the grape kool-aid concentrate reacting with the somehow-expired kerosene. it was a good idea.

i thought, since it tasted like grape, it would be purple. she expected it to be orange. ah but no, turns out...fucking shit is exactly the same color as ecto cooler. green kool-aid green. so i poured a fat glass of what i then knew to be diluted snot and finished the goddamn thing after a couple hours. it felt like a bad trick on double dare.

gardenofevils nailed it: it's the worst of both worlds. and when you're talking about the worlds of energy drinks and malt liquors, anyway it was gross.

is this week three? i lost track. high volume smoothitude commencing.

Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh she was shakin'
Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh she was shakin'
Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh she was shakin'
Sh-sh-sh-sh-sh she was shakin'

(video does not seem to be about what they are talking about)

thanks to the big release and a flex day resulting from training, i had a very interesting first week of on-the-floor work.

i got more overtime my first week at this job (exceptional situation being the new release) than i did the last year or two at the movie theatre. i got a flex day and thus with sneaky planning my first week was followed by a three day weekend. i received both free pizza and free sub sandwiches the first week of real work, both of which were awesome.

so the talking point is i'm paranoid and waiting for the other shoe to drop. the reality is probably closer to this is finally that cool (not perfect but cool) job i've been waiting for almost a decade to get. maybe it's just time for everything to not suck for a while.

and you know what that sounds like? that sounds like thinking positive.

i have finished my training program. now there's a week of training wheels floor work and then regular schedule and whatever.

today we had to put our beautiful little kitten to sleep. she doesn't have to be sick anymore. we hate that our adventure with her had to end, but nothing could be prevented or corrected. she was 11 years old and the last alive of her litter.

it was cancer; i am not interested in providing more details. we are doing what we can to handle it. it was a peaceful and calm end to a heart-crushing ordeal. everyone has been supportive and helpful and the three of us will eventually be able to move on.

what a horrible day. she didn't deserve this. there is a terrible emptiness to home now.

yesterday's twitter noise:

• 21:55 I'm told I'm handling this surprisingly well. #

by

yesterday's twitter noise:

• 16:24 Brain overload. Trodding through a bad dream at super surreal half speed. #
• 21:34 Funky Forest: The First Contact was top-notch surrealism. A modern Japanese dream. www.imdb.com/title/tt0451829/ #
• 21:50 Popcap's empire is so huge that it is becoming a threat to national security. #

by

aced another test.

there's this ridiculous but cool accessibility feature in osx now. i don't know what it's called, but it flips the screen to its opposite color for high contrast or whatever. it's a negative of the screen. the shortcut is ctrl-opt-com-8.

it makes the internet look weird.

in preparation for my daily grind, i photoshopped my plants vs. zombies avatar to livejournal size. fuck the livejournal cropper, by the way.

new icon.

after almost a year of ridiculously arduous job search and endlessly tormenting poverty, i return to work. i'll be working with phones, which isn't exactly something i like, but i also don't much care anymore. i just want something to take up eight hours a day that doesn't involve me thinking of a brilliant plan.

it should be easy, laid back, and casual. i might've just tripped the wire on all my years of luck debt if this works out as nicely as it appears it could.

It’s been about ten months, but I made another radio-type show for your songs-hearing enjoymentification. It’s about an hour, so perfect for that walk to work or that walk workout or that walk at work.

The last show was last year, so it’s been a long time coming, and as such briefly discussed is the uneventfulness of this year.

Download this show here.

I’d include a player here, but I can’t seem to find any on hand that aren’t complete pieces of shit that lack volume control. You can stream this if you’re subscribed to this site in the google reader, though.

This show was brought to you by beer. Thanks for listening and all that bullshit.

bonus: light visual aid for the period this show covers.

( songs spoiler )

in preparation for a new radio-type show, i've finished the song list for the one from last, um, october. if you missed the show, it's still awesome and makes an mp3 player really earn its keep.

at some point, i will be nominated for sainthood just for putting up with gardenofevils's bullshit on a nigh-daily basis.

but i give her too much shit.

michelle visited today. we went to mcmenamin's brew pub and i showed her around the town and house a little. it was nice.

This should basically be self-explanatory.

(from fiction is lying).

i have received and accepted an offer for employment. i start in two weeks. aced their tests for typing and technical customer service. amazed them with mad charm and respectable work history. destroyed all their preconditions with maximum readiness.


i will be on the phones supporting some computer products and the like, with an already noted opportunity at quick advancement and moving up. one month paid training to start, and the pay is on par with what i was getting at the last job.

dress code: "no pajamas or leather pants." seriously. i can wear shorts and flip flops if i feel the need.

it all looks to be turning around, and on a dime. here we go.

let's just put it this way: i've had so many nightmares this year of such awful, inspiringly horrible, and weird imagery, that in a way i wish i was still in film school so that i could exorcise that shit on some cellulose.

current typical example: "In today's nightmare someone cut 'LEFTHANDEDLY' around two different, separate fingers on my left hand, with a knife." all day i've been touching the middle joint on my middle finger and the base joint on my ring finger just to feel how they're not cut open, as if in some preparation for the day when they will be, so i can remember what they were like before. i could feel it in the dream. it hurt. it almost hurts now. they were crudely carved in letters (3/8") that would be too big to actually fit such a large word around a finger. the only way to see what it said was wipe away blood and look at the actual deep cuts, and closely look all the way around the fingers multiple times.

why would my brain show me this? is it some sort of arthritis message?

the kinds of body horror and nonsensical associations i experience most days would be prime fodder for experimental film. yeah, i know, "just do it." not that easy.

i do have some ideas though. first drafts at best, but there's some things going on up there besides nightmare distilling.

i would like some more interaction from livejournal.

i know "write more", and i will, but what else should i do?

so let's try this:

What would you like to know about me?

This should be basically self-explanatory.

(from fiction is lying).

it seems a bunch of you got your wish. loudtwitter hasn't been up for a few days. i will have no way of searching for how clever i was that one time.